My Wandering Heart

Mark 9:14-29

Mark 9:24 Immediately the father of the boy cried out, “I do believe; help my unbelief!”

This verse comes from the section of the book of Mark where a father is asking Jesus to cast out a demon from his son. I’m going to be focusing on verse 24 written out above.

This desperate father is pleading with Jesus to help relieve his son from this evil spirit. The Apostles had already attempted this feat and failed (I can only imagine what was going on in their own heads). But this father then turns to ask for Jesus’ in which Jesus asks this father if he believes that Jesus can do this very thing that he is asking of him.

The reply of this desperate father is one that resonates deeply within me, because I too find times when I am struggling to believe and that is when his response comes into action.

“I do believe; help my unbelief!”

This father asked Jesus to help his unbelief! There are times when I find it so difficult to read my Bible, to pray, to praise God. But one thing remains true no matter if I’m in a season of plenty or nothing and that is, that God is still worthy to be loved, he’s still worthy to be praised, he is still worthy of my faith.

And then I find myself repeating the call of this father, “Jesus I do believe; please help my unbelief!” And similarly “God, help me to love you more, to trust you more, to praise you more!” And God does just that, we must stay committed to God even in our times of desperation and when it’s difficult to pray. Because God’s worthiness never changes, rather we are the ones who away from the path and find ourselves feeling like God is distant.

Today, was one of those days for me. I didn’t want to read His Word. I had no desire to pray. And I had little to nothing of that feeling of “love” in my heart towards God. But His worthiness of such things is still present. So I have come to realize how true the words of the hymn, Come Thou Fount is.

photo of gray concrete road in the middle of jungle during daylight
Photo by Kaique Rocha on

“Oh, to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be
Let that goodness like a fetter
Bind my wandering heart to Thee
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it
Prone to leave the God I love
Here’s my heart, oh, take and seal it
Seal it for Thy courts above”

But true love is a conscious decision, not a feeling. So, I asked God to please help me in this time, to forgive me for my lack of desire and love towards Him. Because no matter how much we do whether we’re on fire to the Lord or running dry. We can ALWAYS love Him more, pray more, read His Word more, and serve Him more.

So now I ask you (the reader), do you feel like God is worthy right now? If you do not then I would urge you to seek God in prayer in His Word and in prayer, even if it’s the last thing that you feel like doing.

Because it is at our times of greatest desperation that God is wanting His people to be the most faithful. (Even in the seemingly small things).

Also, read the section of verses above! You won’t be disappointed and if you feel like you can read more than read more! Read to learn more about God and to glorify Him!

God Bless!

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